OK, I’ve been teaching English in a South Korean classroom almost three years now. As Art Linkletter used to say “kids say the darnedest things.” Yeah, let’s go with weirdest.
So one of our words was “version.” I usually try to help kids understand this by using something that all Korean kids understand – computers. So Windows 98 is a version of Windows, XP, 2000 and Vista are other versions of Windows. Usually they get this. So, after everyone in this one class said that yes, they understood, I asked “OK. What’s a version?” One of the girls pointed at one of the boys and said “Him!”
Different class, different year even, we’re learning about adjectives. They have a gap-fill exercise with many adjectives and they’re to put the most appropriate with each sentence. One of the boys is reading his answer: “I have a big dick… Teacher? What’s this word?” “Dictionary.” “Oh. I have a big dictionary.”
Another class, and I’m talking about pop music with some boys who have been to America. Korean kids often take to American country music. I think this is simply that it’s easy to understand the words. Anyway… One of them really liked John Denver. What’s his favourite song? You know, the one that goes “almost heaven west vagina…”
Most of my students know that I have a cat. Cat’s aren’t really popular pets in Korea, which is odd given the apartment lifestyle. People prefer to paper train a small dog because you can’t walk a cat. Koreans love to take their dogs with them a la Paris Hilton. Also, there are superstitions about the shape of a cat’s eye. So, we’re talking about cats. One girl raises her hand, “Teacher, is your cat a big cat or is it a cute cat?”
We’re talking about herbs in class, something that aren’t used in Korean cooking. I always find this interesting, because I had a long talk with a Greek chef working in Ilsan. He was thrilled to be serving foreigners because we didn’t automatically pour hot pepper sauce all over his carefully prepared dinners. The use of mint or oregano on food just doesn’t appeal to Koreans. So, knowing that they wouldn’t have had a lot of exposure to herbs, I brought in some oregano. The kids sniff the oregano and make a variety of repulsive faces. Finally one student says, “Teacher, that’s not food, it’s medicine.”
— SGP
